Monday, August 29, 2011

One dream, many questions…


I had a dream last night, or was it a dream? Was I struck somewhere between the conscious and the subconscious, or was I awake? Is the reality in which I am awake also a dream? Being in the state of dream, does it makes it less real? How to tell if your subconscious mind has taken over your conscious one, or is it always like that? Is there a free-will? One dream, many questions…



Could not control with all my might
My left hand rose, and then my right.
Then I rose, I felt so light.  
The darkness around me turned to white.

I heard them shout, I heard them scream,
‘The freak is out, let’s kill him.’
I also heard few young and old
Who cried, ‘Comeback and save our soul’.

I have no power to curse or heal,
There are no secrets to reveal,
There is no decision wrong or right,
But you cannot be free if you hold tight.

That’s when I woke up. It was early morning, and it was raining. I raised my hand, yes I was in control, and I went back to sleep. Then when I woke up later and thought about the dream, I wondered.

When I raise my hand, is it a conscious decision out of my free will? If I take a decision consciously, weighing the pros and cons, then the decision will be biased by my thought process. My thought process would depend on the way I was brought up, and to an extent on my genes (that controls the hormones, which in turn controls the way I react). So, if my future depends on the decision I take, which in turns depends on the past that’s fixed, isn’t my future also fixed? Is my feeling of free-will just an illusion created out of the randomness that surrounds me?

Maybe I am wrong. The world isn’t that deterministic after all. If it was then game theory would have predicted all our moves. It cannot, because human beings do not behave rationally. Rational behavior is predictable, but it’s our stupidity that probably gives us our free-will. It’s a quantum world of uncertainties. Maybe the world is random, and so are our decisions. It might not be conscious decisions, but the decision of the subconscious that controls us. They say our subconscious decides for us 300ms before we think we are taking a decision. If our decisions are governed by our subconscious, then again how could we have free-will?

The more I think the more I feel like my decision to think was predetermined. Or maybe it’s just the limitation of my brain that makes me feel so. May be it’s the limitations of the words, that I cannot express. But then what has freewill to do with freedom. Let go of the ‘will’ and you will be free. Let go of life, you will be free. Or else you stay trapped in the circle of birth and death; which isn’t bad either as long as you are having fun.

Born from dust….Conscience aghast
Time await….A decided fate
Love constrain….In lover’s lane
Transforms fast.…From love to lust
A new seed….To love and feed
Then it rust….Return to dust

But then, death might not be the end, but a metamorphosis.

49 comments:

  1. And maybe it doesnt matter after all... That we only live for the experience. No matter good or bad.

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  2. Very interesting...speaking of which...was this post written by your free will or your sub conscious knew this before?  :P

    On the whole, quite a thought provoking post...but as you said...it does not matter as long as you are having fun...or you think you are having fun..or your sub conscious tells you before that you are having fun..without you actually getting to the fun part already  ;)

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  3. Thought provoking post and I loved it. Brilliant read...

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  4. A nice post as usual.... Can't comment much on dreams....
    However loved the way you ended it :)

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  5. Death indeed is a metamorphosis, just like birth.. a very nice post.. as usual.. and nice poem too..

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  6. by gawd, will is what kills us at the end of each day and each dream!

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  7. i think about this stuff all the time....dreams,subcoscious...its all too confusing.
    great post though :) as always u shaked my grey cells :)

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  8. Wow dude..deep stuff man :)

    U mite find NLP interesting considering it deals a lot with the conscious and unconscious parts of the minds.. but then again, I think u already have :)

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  9. Great post. Thought provoking.
    Loved the para... "When I raise my hand...............surrounds me"

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  10. You should watch Inception and Source Code. They can answer your question.

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  11. "Is my feeling of free-will just an illusion created out of the randomness"....free will is what you wish to do, overlooking the norms or the general expected protocol followed....so as long as you indulge in what  you like, irrespective of whether that will springs from nature (read : your genes) or nurture (read : your parenting and the dressing of your thought process) , as long as you can shove off the mundane and the trite, the much loathed ;as long as the will doesn't think before it acts...its free and its no illusion...its a living reality.
    nice post!.

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  12. "I have no power to curse or heal,
    There are no secrets to reveal,
    There is no decision wrong or right,
    But you cannot be free if you hold tight"...loved these lines :)

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  13. deep thought....Liked the poetry too....

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  14. This was really well-written.. Got me thinking for long... Deep stuff..
    keep writing :D

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  15. too deep. n very thoughtful. liked the poem written. i think its ur second poem. u r good at rhyming :)

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  16. I wish i knew :)
    but when i will, i probably wont seek attention here ;)thanks Kunal :)

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  17. :)...thanks PK Talli aka Chintan 

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  18. lol...those grey cells :)

    thanks Kiran

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  19. thanks Warwinrules :)

    no i haven't....but after reading your comment i goggled it...it's interesting :)

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  20. Inception is one of my favorite...thanks Prateek :)

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  21. thanks Stuti...
    may be you are right...some may agree, some may argue...i will keep my options open :)

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  22. thanks a lot Msneha Mathur :)

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  23. Thanks a lot Confused Soul :)

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  24. thanks Anu...no probably the 4th one in Khoj, if rhymes are considered poems :)

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  25. Great post, you are talented in addition to being smart :p

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  26. Keep probing.. you will be at ease sooner or later.

    Peace
    -FP

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  27. lol, that would make my day :D
    thanks Anjali :)

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  28. Very deep and thought provoking post... Lots to ponder upon!

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  29. Trust Sub to wake up and analyze his dreams. But you finished with a comforting line...death is not the end but
    a metamorphosis!

    Loved it.

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  30. Our decisions might all be subconsciously predetermined and decided, so nothing is done by our own will. May be we should call this "fate", everything is written and we just follow what's written for us. And I luved the last part of the post, From Dust, and to Dust again. Death might not be the end, but a metamorphosis. Excellent line 

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  31. How do you manage to think so clearly about the abstract? And then you put them down so well. We have to learn a lot from you.

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  32. i thought i was not really able to express myself :)

    thanks a lot :)

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  33. Your post is too abstract so I cannot give a proper comment here but I think you should read " The interpretation of dreams" by Freud. It's a very interesting book.

    Btw, I like the poem, did you write it yourself ?

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  34. may be a proper comment next time :)
    thanks for visiting...sure will read it
    yes i have written them, or may be my subconscious :)

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  35. Felt like I was dreaming when I read your post :) It was so so so apt, why did I not visit your blog any earlier, Its so good, I wish I'd written this :)

    The poem is knitted so well :)

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  36. Thanks a lot Ayushi...glad u liked it :)

    will sure do...

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  37. didn't know you even write poems! Loved them :)  very interesting and as usual blended with your unique style... 

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